Christmas Lunch at The Alphen. What a hugely disappointing experience. We were a party of 5, had booked and paid upfront (months in advance) for what we expected — at the price and its reputation — to be a beautiful Christmas lunch at Blanko, The Alphen Hotel's elegant restaurant. It turned out to be the most underwhelming, badly managed event of the year. The kind of story foreigners would tell their friends back in London about, and why it's no longer worth coming to Cape Town. Our group are all locals, btw, who paid ZARs for the biggest rip-off of the year. 1. Our reservation was for 13.00. We were on time. After we had ordered drinks and selected our meals from the small (read: unexciting) set menu, we waited two hours for our starters. After an hour, we began asking when we could expect to get our food and were told that the kitchen is very busy today (yes — it's Christmas Day, surely you knew what to expect and had planned your resources accordingly? ). 2. After starters, another hour's wait for main courses. Would love to have started eating, but we had no cutlery. After asking two waiters, one of us eventually went inside the restaurant and asked the manager for cutlery, which took another five minutes to get to the table. By which time our food was cold — nothing like cold, soggy pastry on a cold Beef Wellington — but we were too scared to send our food back, in case we had to wait another hour. 3. We kept having to ask the staff to clear our dirty glasses / empty plates / order coffees — nothing was offered, we certainly never felt looked after or made to feel special, but rather as if we were a nuisance, getting in the way of them trying to do their jobs (to serve customers, I presume). One guest was served a cold Americano, which we sent back. After waiting and asking, one of us again had to get up, go into the restaurant and ask why it took 20 minutes to remake a coffee. 4. Paying the bill — i. E. Drinks and coffees (food had been paid in advance), I went inside and personally asked the manager — took another 15 minutes of standing at the bar, waiters scuttling, manager apologising for the delay. At which point I asked the manager to take my number and call me the next day (today), as I did not want to spoil my Christmas any further — and all I really wanted was to get out of there as quickly as I could. Of course, no call from the manager today. This was not a cheap outing. It would have been a pricey lunch in any currency. But it was Christmas and we felt like spoiling ourselves. I will happily pay a premium for quality, but I hate feeling ripped off. This was a rip-off. More than the money, we wasted half a perfectly beautiful Christmas Day, leaving angry and disappointed. Shame on you, Alphen Hotel. Your reputation will not hold with this kind of inferior service experience. Gee van Veijeren.
3A Quendon Rd, Sea Point, Cape Town.
3A Quendon Rd, Sea Point, Cape Town.